Finding out that your girlfriend, wife, or partner is pregnant—and neither of you planned for it—can feel like the ground has shifted beneath your feet. You might be flooded with questions, fears, or even disbelief. What now? What does this mean for your future? What kind of father will I be? Am I ready for this?
These are real, honest questions. And if you’re feeling overwhelmed, you’re not alone.
Take a Deep Breath
First things first: take a breath. No matter how unexpected this news is, you can do this. She’s not the only one who needs support right now—you do too. You don’t have to have all the answers today. But how you respond right now can make a huge difference in her life and in your relationship.
She Needs You—Even If She’s Not Saying It
Unplanned pregnancy is emotional and complex, and your partner may be scared or unsure. She may not know what she wants to do. She may be looking to you to see how you’ll respond before she opens up about how she really feels. Your steady presence, your willingness to listen, and your support will matter more than you know.
You don’t have to fix everything. Just show up. Be honest. Be kind. Be strong enough to have the hard conversations and gentle enough to let her cry if she needs to.
You Have a Say, Too
While it’s true that her body is carrying the baby, this situation affects both of you. You’re allowed to have feelings. You’re allowed to process the shock, the fear, the uncertainty. You don’t need to stay silent just to “be strong.” Strength doesn’t mean hiding how you feel—it means engaging, being present, and seeking help when you need it.
There are places that will support you, too. You don’t have to carry the weight alone.
Take Time to Understand Your Options
This pregnancy brings with it choices—real ones—and it’s important to take time to learn what each of those options means for you, for her, and for your future. Get the facts. Ask questions. Talk to people who care about your well-being and aren’t trying to push you in one direction or another. The more you understand, the more confident you’ll feel about the path you choose together.
Making an informed decision isn’t just smart—it’s part of being the kind of man who steps up, even in the unknown.
This Doesn’t Have to Derail Your Life
An unplanned pregnancy might not have been on your radar, but it doesn’t have to mean your life is over. It might look different now—but different can be good. Becoming a father can be a powerful, purpose-filled journey. You might be surprised by how deeply it changes you—for the better.
You also don’t have to figure out how to support her, become a dad, and plan your future all on your own. There are people and resources ready to walk with you every step of the way.
You’re Not Alone
At The SHARE Center, we see men in your shoes all the time. Guys who thought their lives were headed one direction and suddenly found themselves staring down fatherhood before they felt ready. We get it. We’re here to listen, offer guidance, and connect you with tools that can help—whether it’s parenting classes, someone to talk to, or just a safe space to process what’s going on.
We believe in you. We believe that you can rise to this moment. And we’re here to help you every step of the way.
Need someone to talk to?
Reach out to us today. We offer confidential, judgment-free support for men navigating unplanned pregnancy. You’re not alone—and you don’t have to have it all figured out. Just take the next step.